Ah, election season in Colorado—a time when campaign coffers overflow with more cash than a Black Friday sale, but instead of discounts, we get bombarded with ominous ads. With spending surpassing $100 million, it’s like a high-stakes game of “Whose Wallet Is Bigger?” minus the actual fun. Meanwhile, candidates hope voters are hypnotized by their 30-second masterpieces of fearmongering.
- Election Spending: Making It Rain (Dollar Bills, Not Votes)
In a stunning revelation, campaign expenditures for Colorado’s 2024 election might just break the bank—and then some—clocking in at over $100 million. That’s right, folks, more money than you’d need to buy every Coloradan a fancy latte is being funneled into ads, ads, and more ads. You’d think with all that cash, candidates could at least make the commercials slightly entertaining, but alas, you’re more likely to be assaulted by dire warnings of impending doom if their opponent wins. It’s as if every ad is auditioning for a role in a political horror show. Read more. - Trump’s Influence: The Ghost of Elections Past
As the MAGA wave continues to ripple through Colorado, the looming shadow of Donald Trump seems to be the GOP’s best friend and worst enemy. Trump enthusiasts still chant his name with the reverence usually reserved for rock stars or mythical creatures, while others in the party squirm uncomfortably, wondering if maybe, just maybe, they should have stuck with Reaganomics and Gipper nostalgia. Read more. - Valdamar Archuleta: The Hero We Didn’t Know We Needed
In what can only be described as a Herculean feat of optimism, Valdamar Archuleta is running in Colorado’s bluest House district. His campaign slogan might as well be “Why Not?” because while he’s not expecting to redecorate an office in D.C. anytime soon, he’s here to show that Republicans can have fun too—preferably in a speakeasy, two stories underground. He’s bringing a much-needed dose of personality to the race, proving politics doesn’t always have to be about winning. Read more. - The 8th Congressional District: The Battle Royale
All eyes are on Colorado’s 8th Congressional District, where the stakes are higher than a Colorado mountain. Incumbent Yadira Caraveo and challenger Gabe Evans are locked in a neck-and-neck race that could tip the scales in Congress. With more cash flowing than you’d find at a Vegas casino, this race is so tight it’s giving political analysts across the nation heartburn. Either way, the aftermath promises to be a spectacle as colorful as the election itself. Read more. - Jena Griswold: Eyes on the Prize
Secretary of State Jena Griswold has everyone guessing about her next move—likely a gubernatorial bid—after her somewhat rocky tenure. With media appearances that rival those of Hollywood A-listers, some say her real talent lies in turning a routine press conference into a mini-series. Critics argue she should resign to focus on her ambitions; supporters argue she’s exactly the kind of media-savvy candidate Colorado needs. Either way, popcorn sales are up as everyone waits to see what she’ll do next. Read more.
So, what’s keeping you entertained during this political theater? Is it the ad budgets that could fund a lifetime supply of lattes or the bold moves of candidates who seem ready for a reality TV debut? Share your election thoughts, ad rants, or political bingo cards in the comments below. Let’s make sense of this spending spree together!
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